We All Are
by Perfectly-Imperfect-14
Summary: I sat. He talked. He pleaded for me to look at him, to talk to him. But I didn't. I couldn't. I knew that those blue orbs would remind me of them. Of my designer, my friend, and my little duck. They would remind me that I am the reason we're broken.
1. Chapter 1

Thanks for reading! This is my first fanfiction, but I have written other stories before. I am not asking for you to go easy on me just because this is my first story on here. All reviews are appreciated! Also, should I make this a multi-chapter?

Disclaimer: All characters belong to SC.

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><p>I hear the door slam from behind me. I don't look up. There is only one person that visits me anymore. The boy with the bread. <em>My<em> boy with the bread. Unless it's time for a meal, Greasy Sae doesn't come. And Haymitch? Ha, he's probably drunk. Hell, he's _always _drunk. There's no use of hoping he'll show his face around here.

"Katniss!" I hear him call from the kitchen. I don't answer. I never do. "I brought cookies," he says lightly, while walking into the living room. I feel a shift in weight on the couch and know he has sat down beside me. I don't look at him. I can't.

"Prim loved those cookies," I drone. There is no expression in my voice. I keep staring at the fire, never looking at the hijacked man beside me. If I did, I know that just seeing those blue eyes would kill me. They would break me down. They would remind me that they are all dead because of my stupid mistake. That I'm the reason he is like this.

"Katniss. Think of Prim." He stands up, "Think of her, watching you waste your life sitting here staring at the damn fire everyday! Do you think she would want this? Is this why you started the rebellion?" He throws down the cookies. I flinch, but do not speak. I've gotten used to this. He is tired from the bakery, has venom in his body, and he is frustrated because I have become an empty body. I don't blame him for his sudden out burst.

He stays silent and touches my arm. The couch sinks down and he wraps his arms around me. His left cheek is against my shoulder.

"I'm sorry. For everything," Peeta whispers into my hair, "I just don't want to loose you. I want to see you smile, and laugh, and sing. You've been like this for weeks." I look at the fire again and see Cinna, Finnick, Rue, and Prim. My designer, my friend, my ally, my little duck, all watched me. Is this what they gave up their lives for, me hiding from the world? I sighed.

"Katniss, please talk to me. I'm so sorry," he pleads. I almost consider laughing. He can be such a child, one minute mad, then next, pleading for my forgiveness. "I'm really sorry," he says again. I open my mouth and even surprise myself by talking. And maybe, we can make it.

"It's okay. We all are."


	2. Back to the World

Hello! Thanks for all of your wonderful reviews and alerts! If anyone has any ideas for this story, please say it in your review or in a PM. Thanks!

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><p>The morning light flows through the window. That isn't what wakes me though. It's the sound of whistling. "<em>Greasy Sae," <em>I think immediately. Then I hear it. The steps of a hippo. I roll my eyes and mutter, "Oh, Peeta. You'll never be quiet."

Slowly, I climb out of bed and throw on the same clothes from yesterday, a pair of black cargos and a forest green tank-top. There's no point of looking decent if there is no one to impress.

_"But there is," _The rebellious part of my mind thinks. I scold myself. Peeta? I'd have better chances with Haymitch. He could never have feelings for me after everything I've done and failed to do. I'm the reason he is like this. I'm why he's broken.

I trudge down the creaky staircase and look into the kitchen. On the table was a tray of puffy, hot cheese buns. I search for the creator of these master pieces. He is nowhere to be found.

I jog to the table and take a seat. I plop some bland oatmeal-from Greasy Sae-into my bowl and chow down. I take a couple cheese buns and carefully set them on my plate. Once again, I look for Peeta. He is still missing. _"Good. Now he won't see me stuff myself." _At that thought I dig in. The china plate only has three more of the cheesy bread.

The oatmeal bowl, my plate, and the china plate get put into the sink. I wrap up the cheese buns and put them into the cupboard.

"Well, someone was hungry," someone laughs from behind me. I jump and grab the nearest knife. The dish I was cleaning drops to the floor, shattering on impact. I am preparing to throw the knife when I get a glimpse of my pursuer. Blond hair, blue eyes...Peeta. He jumps back, with his hands up.

"Hey, no need to slice my stomach open!"

"Next time, _tell_ me you're there!"

"Sorry," He mutters and reaches to rub the back of his neck. Then I see it. Crimson liquid running down his wrists from his hands. I grab his wrists, pulling his hands down so I can see them. They had about five, small, deep cuts.

"What did you do?" I shriek.

"I, uh, kinda broke the window."

"Why on earth would you do that?"

"Nightmare," Is all he replies with. I immediately stop. I nod and run to grab the bandages from the supply closet. Reaching down to wrap his hands a truck of grief hits me. _Prim._

My breathing picks up and my body goes rigid. My hands freeze. I look up to say something to Peeta, but all I see is Prim. Blond hair, blue eyes. Prim, Prim, Prim, Prim.

"N-no," I shake my head. By now the blood from his hands has dripped onto the floor. My feet slip on the slick, crimson blood as I stumble out of the room and the house. I bolt into the Seam, looking for my house, or what's left of it. I run to the spot it was and see wooden boards and cement blocks.

Soon, those planks of wood are being broken and the cement is being thrown as far as possible. All of this is done with me sobbing and screaming. Randomly, I take handfuls of the ashes and fling them into the air.

The gleaming catches my eye when I had thrown my tenth handful of ashes. I make my way towards it and grab it. What I see totally unhinges me. Without another thought I sprint into the woods, my sister's locket in my blackened hand.

When I stop to finally take a breath, I realize where I am. The lake. The first thing happened id the locket goes soaring into the air, landing in the glittering water with a satisfying "Plop!"

I run into the hut and throw out my bow and the fishing poles. After everything is destroyed, I curl up and sob into my knees. My energy gone, I do something I never thought I would do again. I sing. I sing her favorite song.

_Way up high_

_With those birdies in the sky_

_I float of clouds of wishes_

_Never have I been so free_

_Here with just you and me_

_Our dreams on china dishes_

_Sitting in these clouds_

_I have not doubts_

_That you and me were meant to be_

_Hoping this never ends_

_Being here with all my friends_

_This is love, everyone can see_

That song is repeated back to me by the fluttering mockingjays. That's all I hear before I gather the strength to go back to the boy with the bread. Back to the world.

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><p>Thanks for reading! Please review ideas and compliments!<p> 


	3. For Him

Hello! Thanks for all of your AMAZING reviews! Special thanks to:

**Mockingjay99** (Thanks! Here's the next chapter!), **lolyy** (The rest of the story will be longer!), **Kandykane5150** (Thanks for liking it! I will try to post as often as I can!), **maryclumsy **(Here's the next chapter!), and especially, **Lachalora **(Thank you so much for all your support!)

Here's the next chapter!

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><p>The rain fell harder and harder, never once letting up through the many hours it's been keeping us in. I groan and flop onto the red, worn couch. The TV remote is on the table, in the same spot it's been in since I came back from the Capitol and the rebellion.<p>

"Ya know, Haymitch thinks we are all going to drown," Peeta says from inside the kitchen, "Then again, he _was _drunk."

"Psh, when is he _not_?"

"True." I grin. After my explosion, Peeta and I have been on better terms. It's not totally mended, but our relationship has been going more smoothly. Time was still needed. Breakdowns were still common here.

I grab the TV remote and flip the television on. There were cooking shows, fashion shows-apparently, the Capitol is still all about unnatural looks-and some art classes. One catches me by surprise. It is a documentary. On the tale of the star-crossed lovers.

_"The duo was reckless, defiant, rebellious. And symbolic. They _were_ the rebellion, the revolution. Starting in the 74__th__ Hunger Games, they sparked hope for a change. _

_First, the idea that there was love in the Games. Then, the berries. Next, the force field in the Quarter Quell. Then, Katniss became the Mockingjay. Together, they led the rebels to victory. But, there is one thing that everyone is asking, now that the rebellion is over. What is headed for them now?" _I turn the TV off after they switch to commercial break. The words echo in my head while I stand up and stagger into the kitchen.

"What's next? What are we supposed to do now?" I question my friend. His hands put down the dough he is kneading and he looks at me with his forehead scrunched up in thought. _He looks kind of cute like that…_I think, before admonishing myself for thinking such a thought. _Remember, Katniss? You ruled out romance a long time ago! _My brain says. _Yes, but that was before the rebellion! Now there is nothing to worry about! _My heart strikes back.

I shake myself out of the foolish banter I was having with myself and force my attention to what Peeta was saying.

"We could start a bakery?" Peeta suggests, "Or we could find jobs in a District? The Capitol….I'm fine with whatever you want." I consider the options. Another District? No. A bakery? Peeta would be good with that, but I couldn't bake to save a life. The Capitol? _Neither _of us would be happy with that. Too many bad memories.

"As long as we don't turn into Haymitch, I'm okay with being like this. We can visit other Districts to see our friends, but no living there. The Capitol would be fun for, hmm, three minutes," I tell him, "The bakery would be a great thing for you, but I would probably just poison anyone that buys the bread I made."

"Then how about I teach you?" He laughs. I just stare at him, my jaw slack.

"You're kidding me, right?"

"No! It'll be fun!"

"You don't know how bad I am at cooking. I probably would set the whole country on fire!"

"C'mon! I promise you won't kill us all."

"No." I cross my arms.

"Please!" He gives me his best puppy-dog face.

"No."

"Why not?" God, he is being a baby today.

"Because."

"That's not a good enough reason,"

"It is for me. So, no." With that I stomp away.

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><p>"What goes in first? Flour, or sugar?" I ask, holding up two containers holding white stuff in it.<p>

"What do you think, Katniss?"

"Why are you asking me? You're the baker here!"

"Jeez, Katniss. I was just asking you're opinion! The flour goes first," Peeta says, while mixing some stuff together in a bowl. Apparently, he gave me the "easy" part. I disagree with that.

"Katniss, this isn't hard!"

"Yeah, for you it isn't! I don't know what the hell I'm doing!" He rolls his eyes.

"Fine. What do you want to make?"

"Uhm…" I trail off while looking at all the recipes. "How about, the nutty bread? It looks fairly easy. Unlike this damn cake. What do you think?" I turn around to see Peeta clutching the counter. His knuckles are a snowy white. His beautiful blue eyes are squeezed shut and he looks as he is in pain.

"The District was bombed. Real or not real?" He asks, his face still contorted with agony. It takes me a minute to find my voice.

"Real." He looks up with hatred in his eyes.

"It happened because of you. Real or not real?" I'm stunned. I can't find an answer for that. Yes, it was directed for my pain, but it wasn't my doing. If I hadn't rebelled, it wouldn't have happened.

"Uh, real and not real." He looks at me with confusion and anger.

"What?" Peeta says, looking into my eyes.

"Snow bombed District 12 because he wanted to hurt me. So, in a way, it was my fault, but it really isn't," I explain.

"So, my family wasn't killed by you, but by President Snow." He confirms. I notice his eyes were almost at normalcy.

"Yes. I'm sorry," I reply as I see tears well up in his eyes. He furiously wipes them away, but I wrap my arms around him and let him cry. I think of how he has always been there for me. He was there in both Games. He was there when the nightmares came. He was there when I grieved for Prim. I let him cry, and try to think of a time I was there for him.

The only time that comes up is when I took care of him during the first Games. I realize how unbelievably selfish I have been. Running away, shunning him when he took care of me, and not even fixing his hands when I had an emotional breakdown. I grab his hand and slightly tug, indicating that I want him to follow me. He slowly hobbles behind me, and I lead him upstairs into his room. I pull back his blankets and fluff up his pillow. Pulling out an extra sheet, I see him climb into the bed. The blanket gets laid over him and I tuck him in, with a kiss on his temple, and the words 'be right back'.

I sneak down the stairs and clean up the mess that we had made. Never, would I have thought Peeta would be giving me cooking lessons. Never. Then again, I never even thought we would ever talk to each other. My mind goes back to how vulnerable he looked when he was thinking of his family.

I finally realize that everyday he is acting strong. For me. As I climb in next to sleeping Peeta, I make myself a promise. A promise for Peeta. I vow, that from now on, _I _will be strong for _him._ And he won't need to be strong for me. Because now, I am being strong for him.

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><p>How was it? I'd really like to know, so please review! Also, has anyone seen the "Safe and Sound" music video? It's quite interesting! Anyway, ideas, comments, and compliments are appreciated!<p> 


	4. The book

Hey everybody! Thank you **SO MUCH **for all you awesome alerts and reviews! I'm really sorry about how long you had to wait for this chapter, it was my BIRTHDAY! So, here is a note to my reviewers of this chapter:

**Lachalora **(You are amazing, you know that right?), **kandykanes5150**(Yeah, I would've liked that, but I'm sure non-fans wouldn't know what was going on. Thanks for liking my story!),** RENEE **(Ha-ha you are too funny. I'm glad to have friends like you!), and **iam97 **(Yeah I've been having serious problems with Fan Fiction. It hasn't been letting me log in or review!) Thanks to all of my followers and reviewers! Here is Chapter 4!

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><p>"Hey there, friend!" comes from my former mentor as he barges through the front door. My hand meets my forehead and I roll my eyes.<p>

"Peeta is working on building a bakery. It's just me today, Haymitch," I say as I step from the sink to him. He is leaned against the wall, surprisingly sober. I raise my eyebrow.

"Don't look at me like that," he accuses, "I came here for two reasons." I sit down on one of the several wooden chairs around the simple table. Haymitch is in my house, sober. This has to be important.

"So, what is the problem?" I ask, popping a grape in my mouth.

"The doctors in the Capitol want to take Peeta back. They think he hasn't recovered enough to stay. Also, they know he has been living here. They want you two to stay away for a couple weeks. They are coming tomorrow. Be prepared," and with that he stands up and leaves. I am stunned for a few seconds. _They want to take Peeta _echoes in my mind. Then my senses come back. I sprint out the door wildly and search for the old man.

"Haymitch!" I yell, "Wait!" I grab his arms and spin him around. He looks at me while I catch my breath. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Convince them," he states plainly and marches to his house, ready to get drunk. And I am left standing in the dirt road, thinking of every possible way to keep my boy with the bread by my side.

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><p>That day, Peeta comes home, a letter in his hands. He tosses it on the counter and catches his breath.<p>

"Read, letter," he huffs. I grab his shoulders and straighten him up and look him in the eyes.

"I already know. Haymitch told me," I tell him. He wraps his arms around me.

"I don't know what I will do without you," he whispers.

"Sh, it's okay," I reply and seat us on the couch. He and I stay in that same position until I figure it is time for dinner. I hold him and whisper seven simple words. _"And I will never let you go."_

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><p>After dinner Peeta and I decide to try to tidy up the house. As Effie would say, 'A clean house makes a productive house!' Haymitch comes and helps a bit, since Ripper is out of town and his cupboards are empty. Peeta is cleaning the windows, his blond hair gleaming in the sunlight.<p>

"Hey, sweetheart, are you going to get to work or are you just going to stand and stare at Lover Boy all day?" Haymitch grins. That earns him a punch to his arm. I mumble a small "shut up" and get back to sweeping in the living room.

"Haymitch, go clean upstairs. You can take the extra room and the bathroom," I instruct him, "I'll clean the bedrooms." I look over to the blonde haired boy.

"I'll take the rest of down here," Peeta says finishing off the last window. Haymitch and I give him a slight nod and head up the stairs.

"Ugh…too...many…stairs…" the older man breathes. I grin and go faster up the flight. Grabbing the rags and cleaner, I jog into my bedroom. Drawer after drawer is emptied. Keys, socks, paper, books, ribbons, and pictures pour out of their wooden confinement. I toss the miscellaneous objects into the trash can behind me. A ribbon from when I was five, a key to the chest that my mom kept pictures of my father in, and a picture of a duck my father sketched.

With each object, my chest gets tighter. _Be strong, Katniss. You can do this_. I pause at one object. A book. It's the plant book. I put it into the empty drawer when an idea comes to me. I run down the flight of stairs and slam into Peeta. He falls, landing on top of me. I ignore the fact that our faces are a few inches apart. Before I can stop myself, the words come spewing out of my mouth.

"We should write a book."

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><p>After we clean everything, we sit down on the couch, the fire crackling. Haymitch decides to listen to my idea.<p>

"The book would be about the people who have perished. People that gave their lives," I explain to the men, "Finnick, Prim, Cinna, Rue, Peeta's father, Madge. All of them." I look to their faces. Peeta looks teary, which is probably what I look like, too.

"This is baloney. I'm outta here," Haymitch says as he stands. He grabs his liquor bottle and saunters out of the house.

"Katniss, why are you suggesting this?" Peeta questions, looking me in the eye.

"I…I feel like it's sort of…my fault…and I need them to know that…that…we won't forget them," I whisper. He nods and grabs some paper. I write while Peeta's hand whizzes across the paper, creating images of our loved ones.

Prim and her goat, Lady, are on the first page. Next, Peeta's father, holding a plate of cookies. Finnick and his sea green eyes fill the third page. Cinna and his ability to make a world out of fabric, next. Then there is Rue, poised on her toes, about to become a Mockingjay. Madge and her quiet kindness, Boggs and his bravery, and Wiress and her ability to know thing before others.

Many hours later, when Peeta is finishing up the gray streaks in Wiress' hair, he suddenly speaks.

"Katniss, how are we going to convince them to let me stay?" he asks while looking at my stormy eyes, much like Wiress' locks. I am locked in his gaze and I grab his broad shoulders.

"We'll think of something," I tell him, "But we made it through poverty, two Hunger Games, and a rebellion. We can do it." He smiles sadly, like he knows something I don't. And I don't like it. "Peeta, what's wrong?" I ask.

He sighs, replying, "That's just it. How did we survive and none of them did?" He gestures to the book we have made, "I should've died. It would've been better for us all." I force him to look straight into my gray eyes.

"Listen to me, Peeta. _Never_, do I want to hear that. Sometimes, I think it, too," I admit, "If you died, then this whole rebellion would be nothing. If I died, that would have just given the rebellion more fuel. But if you died…" my voice falters, but I keep going, "If you had died, then I would've died, too. I would've become an empty shell, much like I was when I lost Prim. But this time, I _know _that no amount of time could heal this scar,"

I check to make sure he was listening, "The rebellion would've failed, because they had no Mockingjay. If you ever think like that, remember me. Remember what I just said." I stand up and gather the book, hoping that that conversation will never have to be had again.

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><p>Peeta climbs into bed later, after we had both taken baths and gotten into out pajamas. Neither of us talks. We simply lay there. It seems as if Peeta had been like a robot after I gave him the lecture. I almost consider leaving, and sleeping in my own bed. But I know that if I do, neither of us will get sleep. So we both just lay there, with the dread of tomorrow taking over our thoughts<p>

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><p>So? How was it? Please review! Thanks!<p> 


	5. To The Capitol

Hey guys! Every single one of you is AMAZING! You seriously made my day with your reviews. **Maryclumsy** (Here is the next chapter!), **PeaceLoveArchery** (Your wish is my command! Ha-ha.), **Kandykanes5150 **(Don't die! You are awesome! I did have some trouble figuring out how to let Capitol officials let Peeta stay….So I let my mind lead the way), **journey4eva **(so glad you like it!), and **Lachalora **(Thanks! I feel so honored to have inspired you. This is my first real story I've let others read outside my class and family. You have inspired me to show my writing to the whole school-Talent Show-and I am really glad you think that I have potential!). Just to let you all know, this chapter is very long and one of my favorites so far! So, here is Chapter 5!

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><p>Nightmares. They never stop, even when I am awake. When I sleep nightmares of Peeta getting tortured, torn apart by mutts, and burned haunt me. When I was awake, my mind is consumed with the dread of when the Capitol train pulls in. As my bleary mind started to make the billionth plan-each one crazier than the next-I start to drift off. <em>Maybe I'll have some peace this time, <em>I think. But the odds have never been in my favor.

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><p>White. Pristine white, to be exact. Here I am, floating barefoot, in a flimsy, white dress. It looks familiar, but I can't quite remember where I've seen this gown. I tear my eyes from my clothes and examine my surroundings.<p>

Dandelion yellow covers the ground. Hundreds of thousands of golden flowers are all around me. _Beautiful, _I think, smiling. Yet, when I look up to the sky, the only words that come to me are "horrendous" and "ominous". The gray sky is filled with thick, dark clouds that seem as if they are waiting, frozen.

Once again noting that my feet have yet to touch the ground, I take a few, cautious steps forward. It looks as if there is glass over the yellow field, and I am walking on it.

My head turns to the left, and my eyes fall upon and ocean. The water is sparkling, like a million diamonds fused together. As I gaze closer, though, I notice the shine has morphed into a fiery orange. Momentarily, I stand there, dumbfounded. I shift my head to face the sky, remember the lurking clouds. And above me, replacing those ominous clouds was a sky of fire.

I open my mouth to scream as the fire poured down onto the field and my body. Instead of my screech comes another. _Prim_. I try to run to meet my precious sister, but I can't move. I feel as if someone had melted a billion pounds into my clothes. My legs are frozen, and my arms fail me, too. I search for the cause, looking down. _The dress._

Suddenly, I remember. The snowy white gown was one of the many I tried on for my faux wedding. My fake marriage to Peeta. My eyes go wide as I scream out in terror. I can feel the bodice getting tighter and tighter, as if Snow was here, slowly squeezing the life out of me.

Minutes later, when the invisible claws let go, I crumple to the ground. I lay there, in a fetal position, as I realize the ground was burning while I was left unharmed. The dandelion field was burning, but not me. Dandelions. Hope. Peeta. Peeta! Looking up, I see a mountain of bones. I stare in horror. Who's were they? Then I notice them. There, next to the pile of corpses, was every single person I have cared for. My father, Prim, my mother, Finnick, Rue, Cinna, Madge, Gale, even Haymitch and Effie were standing in that clump of people, burning and moaning. If he isn't there, then where is he?

I whip my head around furiously, my braid hitting me in the face. Where was Peeta? I just start to scan the water when the thunder starts.

I jerk my head up to the fiery sky to see it falling. His body. It was mangled and burnt in every place. I could only watch, frightened as hell, with my mouth slack. I wanted to run, to scream, to hide, to die. Yet I couldn't even blink. His body went up and came rushing down. Up and down, up and down, up and down. Against the bones, against the people, against the ground. I wasn't truly in agony until I realized the most gut-wrenching, heart shattering thing of all.

He has been screaming through it all.

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><p>The first thing I do is bolt to the bathroom, just barely making the toilet. As I sat there, retching, I let my mind wander. The tears threaten to spill down my sweaty face. "Oh, Peeta, what am I going to do without you," I whisper to myself.<p>

I flush my puke down the drain and look at my face in the mirror. My hair is a mockingjay's nest, my eyes are red and puffy, my voice is sore from the screaming I must've done.

I lean over a little to the left, looking at Peeta sleeping in the glass. At first, I wonder if he is actually having a peaceful slumber. Once again, I am wrong.

He lets out a strangled scream, while gripping the sheets like a life-line. Before I know it, my body is standing next to his tense one. I hesitate, for I haven't tried to wake Peeta before. Will he lash out? Or will he not wake, until I must resort to waking him like I do Haymitch?

Gently, I tap his shoulders. Then shake them. Nothing, both times. This time, I shake his body and yell, "Peeta! Wake up!" He jerks forward, smashing head against mine. He doesn't seem to notice. He grabs me and pulls me tightly into his chest. Minutes pass, and his breathing slows to normalcy. Then the tears come.

"Katniss…" he starts, "We have to convince them," I simply shushed him, rubbing his back.

"We will," I tell him before my eyes start to droop, "I promise."

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><p><em>Ding! <em>I jump, startled. _Ding! Ding!_ I jog to the door, already knowing who was at the door. Haymitch.

"Five minutes," was all he said. It was all that was needed to. Five minutes before the Capitol comes to invade our lives again. I turn and open my mouth to call for the blond haired seventeen year old boy, but he was already coming down the stairs. His face was solemn, as if we were going to a funeral. His eyes, though, show his emotions. Fear filled them.

I grab his big hand and led him outside into the fall air. I want to cry out at the thought that Peeta might be in a different place and a different bed by the end of this day. I grip his hand tighter, for I feel as if I will fall off of this world. _Katniss, _I tell myself, _you need to be strong for Peeta. No crying._

The three of us victors walk on the dirt road, never speaking to each other. Many of the civilians are out today, shopping at the makeshift shops. We must settle with carts until the construction team gets here. Of course we're always last.

The wooden boards of the train station creak as we step onto them.

"Now, no crying, screaming, or injuring the officials," Haymitch breaks the silence, eyeing me at the last part.

"Hey!" I yell, "Don't look at me like that!" Somewhere in the back of my mind I hear Peeta snickering. I turn around, hitting Haymitch in the face with my braid.

"What?" Peeta says, putting his hands up in innocence. I glare at him.

"Not funny."

"Whatever you say, m'lady," He replies, earning a good punch on the arm. "Ow!" he says, faking injury. "That won't stop me from doing this!" He exclaims as he picks me up and puts me on his shoulder, stomach down.

"Let me go!" I yell, but my laughing ruins the effect.

"Never!" he tells me, spinning around.

"Mhm," someone from behind us clears their throat. Peeta quickly drops me and we turn around.

"Oh…hello President Paylor," Peeta says in a respective voice.

"Peeta, Katniss, Haymitch," the President nods, "How are you?"

"Good. And you?" we reply in unison. Paylor sighs and gets to the point.

"Peeta, we believe that the venom Snow had injected in you is not cleared enough for you to be stable enough to remain in District 12. You will come to the Capitol to have a few more therapies done," She explains. We can tell that there is no way that we can persuade the President to let Peeta stay. "You will not need to bring anything. All will be provided for you."

Peeta sadly looks into my eyes. I pull him into my arms, knowing I won't see him for awhile. The train door is opened and Paylor and Peeta step inside. More than anything, I want to be with Peeta. Yet, I know that going back to the Capitol will be hard, knowing that the ghost of my sister will be following me wherever I go. As the door starts to close, I do something that I never thought I would do.

"Wait! I'm coming, too!"

I'm going back to the Capitol.

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><p>I love this chapter! Please give your feedback in reviews!<p> 


	6. Smile On My Face

I heard that a lot of you liked the twist! That is good, but for any of you readers out there that may be shaky on it, I assure you that the plot is still in action! They eventually will go back to District 12. Eventually. **Kandykanes5150** :( Haha you are not a loser! And there were exactly 5 exclamation marks in your review. Haha), **AprilPotter98**:( Thank you! Here is the next chapter, hopefully as good as the other!), **Christina **:( Haha I was laughing when I read your review. Here is the next chapter! Have fun in Florida…with out me…), **HELLO2-4 **:( Thank you so much for reading and liking! Here is chapter 6!)

Thank you so much for reading and liking! Here is chapter 6!) Without further ado, I give you…..Chapter 6!

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><p>One week. That's how long I will be stuck in this horrendous place. I groan, realizing that I will be here for seven days. I will be here for one-hundred-sixty-eight days. I'm too lazy to figure out how many minutes I will be here, but I know it will be too many.<p>

"Um, Katniss…? Are you okay?" Peeta cautiously asks, putting a hand on my shoulder. Turning to face him, I say, "Yeah, I'm fine." He nods, knowing that I am not okay. I am anything but okay.

"Katniss…" Peeta says nervously, shuffling his feet, "You didn't have to come. But…thanks." I smile.

"If I had stayed, then I don't know what I would've done," I rely, throwing my arms around the blond haired boy, "At least here we can be together, no matter how hard it gets." He smiles into the top of my head and at that moment, I don't feel like I'm on a train to the grave of my sister.

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><p>Cameras. A mass ocean of cameras, flashing so much I am sure to have seeing difficulties while we walk out, took over the Capitol train station. I remembered every single time I stood here, none of them having a happy purpose.<p>

The air is filled with, "Katniss, Katniss!" and "Over here! Mr. Mellark and Ms. Everdeen!" The reporters bombard us with questions. All of them speak at once, never giving us a chance to even answer or understand what we are asked. I hear a million different voices at once, until one stands out.

"Excuse me! Ugh, please, manners!" the shrill voice rings out. Peeta and I immediately look at each other, rolling our eyes and grinning. Never, would I have thought I would actually be glad to see my old escort.

"Hello, Effie," Peeta says when the pink haired woman steps out of the crowd. She smiles brightly, and gives Peeta a pat on the shoulder. Her smile continues to me, but falters when a reporter lays a hand on her. She backs off, brushing the hand off of her silk covered shoulder.

"Well, I guess we had better head to your hotel!" She exclaims, motioning for us to move forward. Peeta never lets go of my hand and I am comforted. He will always be there for me. I stumble forward, trying to keep up with the energized Effie. The cameras feel brighter, if that is even possible, and the crowd keeps closing in on Peeta and I. Hands reach out to extend microphones to our mouths. Peeta puts an arm around me, pulling me close. I can hear the crowd get louder at this, shouting over each other.

"Hello, hello! It's been a long time since I've seen these two faces!" comes from the crowd, louder than any other voice. I groan and plaster a smile on my face. The man steps out and pulls Peeta and I into a hug. "Let's get you guys out of here," Plutarch says, leading us down the path that Effie was heading moments ago. She was no where to be seen.

Plutarch, I see, has changed some. His belly has gotten rounder, and his brown hair has gotten darker. He is wearing a pair of navy slacks and a light blue silk robe.

"So, how have you been doing?" he asks, pulling open a sleek black car door and gesturing for us to get in. I slide in and Peeta follows, squeezing in next to me. Plutarch sits down next to Peeta and looks at us, expecting an answer.

"Yeah, we've been doing okay," Peeta tells Plutarch, holding my hand once again. Plutarch gives us the eye and I can tell he knows that everything has not been okay. Keeping his eye on me, he replies, "That's not what I thought, but sure."

"Sir, we have arrived at Maline Hotel. Enjoy your stay. Mr. and Mrs. Mellark," the driver tells us.

"Uh, we aren't married," I say to the man quickly.

"Oh, I'm sorry. I just assumed…since you lived together…" he trails off. My face turns beet red and Plutarch laughs.

"Oh, Katniss. You didn't really think that Panem would forget their favorite couple, did you?" Plutarch chuckles. I glare at Plutarch and storm off, leaving that annoying man and my "husband" in the dust.

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><p>I flop onto the bed, exhausted from the train ride here. Peeta comes and lies down next to me.<p>

"Peeta, why does the Capitol always have to be in our business?" I ask, turning to face him. "I mean, we are only seventeen!" He looks a bit uncomfortable, like he is thinking about something that I wouldn't be happy with.

"Well, I don't _feel _seventeen. Do you?" he replies. I consider this. I really don't feel like I'm seventeen. I feel like I could be a million years old, with all the deaths and pain I have seen.

"I guess you're right," I say and we just lay there. What if we were married? What would happen? Would I be happy? Would he be happy? Do we even feel that way about each other? Could it ever happen? I shake my head to clear my mind.

"Peeta, I need some air. I'll be outside," I say standing up. He nods and goes back to thinking. The fall air is sharp when I step out of the hotel's double doors. I pull my jean jacket tighter around me. My hair starts flying out of my messy braid and I yank the hair tie out of my un-even hair.

Finding a nice little clearing behind the hotel some ways, I lie down and start to day dream about Prim. What would she be doing if she were still here? Knowing her, she would be taking care of Lady or Buttercup. My mind wanders to Gale. How is he doing? Is he working, or is he lounging around in his house? No doubt he already has a girl. What about my mother? Is she doing well? I can wonder all I want. No way in hell will I use that phone.

My mind goes to the most confusing subject. Peeta. Even though he is here with me, I don't really know what is going on between us. I know that he doesn't have feelings for me. But the real question is this: Do I have feelings for him?

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><p>Hospitals bring back a thousand memories, most of them unpleasant. I shudder from my place next to Peeta.<p>

"Sign here and here. Initial here," says the nurse. Peeta scribbles his signature and the nurse looks it over. "You may go see Dr. Aurelius, Peeta. He's in room 342" She says with a smile. Peeta's smile is immediate and his arm nudges my side to tell me to smile. I fake a happy expression and pull on Peeta's arm, leading him down the hall.

"Jeez, Katniss. She was just being friendly," Peeta laughs while I tug him. I grunt and turn right. _335, 336, 337…_turn right…_338, 339, 340…_pass an office…_341…_

"Oh! Hello, Peeta!" Dr. Aurelius says, "Katniss, I wasn't expecting you here!"

"Yeah, well I don't think any of us were," I mumble.

"Okay, Peeta, sit down over here. Do you remember the therapy we did in District 13?" the doctor asks. Peeta nods and gulps. Here we go.

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><p>A crushed hand, five shots, and two hijacking episodes later, Peeta and I walk out of the hospital and down the road to the hotel. I rub my hand while Peeta apologizes again and again.<p>

"Peeta, I said it was fine!" I tell him for the hundredth time.

"I know, it's just that I don't like knowing I caused you pain," he says while hugging me. I roll my eyes and push the hotel doors open.

"Ms. Everdeen. Mr. Mellark," the attendant acknowledges. We nod in response. Peeta and I step into the gleaming elevator and fight over who presses the button. I eventually win the argument, as long as he does it next time.

"I call shower first!" he exclaims as the elevator door opens. He sprints down the hall, probably waking everyone in the hotel.

"Peeta! Sh!" I whisper yell but I am laughing too hard. I follow him and when I get to our room he is panting, waiting for me.

"Took you long enough. I need the key," Peeta says, while pointing to my pocket. I slide out the card and slide it into the slot while he catches his breath. I flop on the bed while he goes into the shower.

"Way over the hills, where the meadow grows, you and I'll be there, where no one knows!" Peeta sings while in the shower. Or, he tries to sing. I laugh and pull the covers over my shoulders. I hear Peeta's loud hippo feet and know he is getting into pajamas. I stay facing away from him as he climbs into the bed, feigning sleep. His lips get close to my ear and he whispers, "Thank you, Katniss. For everything." Then he surprises me. He gives me a kiss on the cheek. That night, I fall asleep with a smile on my face

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><p>That was a kind of sucky ending, I know. This chapter was a filler, so sorry if you didn't like it. Any ideas? Review! Has anyone seen the Safe and Sound TV spot? <strong><span>IT HAS THE BREAD SCENE!<span>**

I freaked when I saw it. So, watch it and **REVIEW**! Thanks!


	7. The Phone Call

I am really, really sorry guys. I was extremely busy last weekend and I just couldn't update. I am really, truly sorry. But I promise I will put an extra chapter up. Any way:

I love you guys. Seriously. You guys are so awesome! **: **(I'm glad that you love it! I love hearing from you! Here is the next chapter!), **Lachalora/Chalora: **(FanFiction has been acting really jerky and stuff. It won't let me review or log in at times. And it's OK that you have been busy, so have I. Thank you _so _much for being there for me and always complimenting my work, even when I doubt myself. I am glad I am improving because I want to make sure all of my readers are satisfied.), **AprilPotter98: **(Aww thanks! I felt like the chapter was OK as one, but there were parts I was somewhat shaking on. I am glad you like it and when I watched to TV spot I called all my friends and had a spazz attack, haha.), **journey4eva: **(I'm glad you liked the last chapter! Yeah the promo was awesome!), **Anonymous: **(Haha I know it's you, Christina!)

I hope that everyone like the last chapter and that this one is just as good, if not better! Here is Chapter 7!

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><p>The vase shatters against the wall. I am uncontrollable. I turn to the man, seething with anger.<p>

"How _dare_ you say that. You have no right!" I screech, chucking another object at the man's head. He ducks just in time, the clock exploding exactly where his head was seconds ago. "He is a living person! You can't do that!" I scream in fury and run to tackle the man. At the last second I am knocked to the ground. Security. I growl and try to throw the man off me.

"Katniss. Calm down!" He yells as he holds my shoulders down. I lift my hands and start to claw at his arms. I haven't stopped screaming. I yell a string of profanities at the man and squeeze my legs underneath his stomach. I throw him off with almost no effort and rise again to confront that worthless piece of Capitol scum called Plutarch.

"You are a disgusting. You are why I revolted! You're why we sacrificed!" I scream, picking up a plate. I won't miss this time. "Peeta is a human. He cannot just be put into a room, locked in there forever, deranged or not!" I pull my arm back.

"K-Katniss, please. He won't go in there. I-I promise," Plutarch whimpers. I glower at the pudgy man.

"I despise you for simply saying that," I counter.

"P-please! What happened to rebels? What happened for helping each other?" He stutters.

"Times change, Plutarch. Things are different now." My arm starts to swing forward before I hear him. I stare at Plutarch.

"Where is he? Tell me now, before I throw."

"Down the hall, to the left," Plutarch says quickly. Before I start to run to Peeta, I turn and face Plutarch.

"This doesn't mean I forgive you." Then I sprint down the hall.

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><p>Peeta is there, strapped to the bed like some kind of animal. I glare at ever single one of the doctors in the room and loosen the restraints on Peeta's arms and legs.<p>

"Miss, I don't think you should…"

"I don't care what you think," I growl before continuing to untie Peeta. No damage has been done to Peeta, or at least none that I can see. I hug him tightly as soon as the restraints are off.

"You okay?" he asks. I laugh and shake my head. He looks me in the eyes. "What happened?" he whispers. I take a deep breath and start to talk.

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><p><em>I wake up to no Peeta next to me. I panic and reach for the phone. <em>

"_Effie?" I ask after I hear the high pitched voice. "Where is Peeta? He isn't here." I hear a little giggle from the other end._

"_Oh I don't know where he is but it's so cute that you are worried for him!" She giggles. I roll my eyes. I can't listen to her annoying voice any more._

"_Good bye, Effie. I'm going to call Plutarch." I hang up before Effie's voice can give me a headache. Plutarch answers after two rings._

"_Plutarch here. How may I help you?" I raise my eyebrow and almost laugh at his ridiculous answer._

"_Plutarch, no need for the intro. It's just Katniss."_

"_Oh. What do you want?" _

"_Peeta isn't here. Do you know where he is?" _

"_Yeah. He had an…accident. He'll be okay," Plutarch explains, "But, if you don't mind, I'd like you to come over to my office."_

"_Thanks. Yeah I'll be there soon." I tell him and hang up. The phone hangs on the wall while I start to get dressed. I throw on some sweats and a jacket. I walk out of my room, leaving the door slightly open. _

_Finding Plutarch's office is not easy. I walk down thousands of hallways and pass billions of doors. I almost give up until I see two wooden, gleaming, double doors. On the right door there is a card saying, 'Plutarch, Head of Communications and Citizens'. It is written on a golden card, in a very hard to read font. And just waking up doesn't help._

_I push the doors open, and I find myself looking into a palace. In the spacious room there are many objects, expensive for sure. In the far right corner is a big, lush plant. Smack dab in the middle is a big, wooden desk, with a throne-like chair behind that. In front of the desk are two purple chairs, covered in velvet. But the most eye catching thing is the back wall. It is made of entirely glass, just cleaned. When you look outside of it you see the while Capitol, all lit up. I stare in wonder until Plutarch marches in._

"_I see you like my office," he smirks, "I could get you one, if you wanted." I just stare at him._

"_If you don't mind, Peeta and I would like to leave this place as soon as possible," I explain to him before taking a seat on one to the plush chairs. He shrugs as he sits down on his throne._

"_That is what I wanted to talk to you about." I roll my eyes and gesture for him to continue. "Mr. Mellark will not be going back with you. Or anytime soon, for that matter."_

"_What! No, he can't…He has to come back!" I yell in surprise._

"_Miss Everdeen, Peeta had a full mental relapse. He _cannot _go back to District 12 in that condition!" I glare at him._

"_What happened? What did you do to him." It was more of a demand than question._

"_Nothing! He was just talking on the phone and had a mental breakdown!"_

"_Who called him?"_

"_I have no idea. The person just said that they needed to speak to Peeta Mellark."_

"_You don't have _any _idea of who called?"_

"_No."_

"_Where is Peeta?" I growl._

"_I can't tell you. The doctors said no visitors."_

"_Tell me. Now," I order._

"_Katniss, you cannot visit him!"_

"_Did you over hear any of their conversation?"_

"_No…well, just a few words," he shrugs._

"_What were they?"_

"_Katniss, twelve, too long…and…Prim." He looks nervous about saying the last one._

"_I am going to find Peeta."_

"_No! If you see him now, you will just send him off the edge! He will be unstable forever and we might as well throw him into a room so you can never see him!" I freeze and turn around. _

"_You will _never_ lock Peeta up like some animal. NEVER." I say, in a terrifyingly calm voice._

"_Yes, we will. And then he will be good as dead. Just like your sister." He says smugly, before realizing his mistake. Plutarch's body goes rigid. I stare into his eyes and I feel hatred I have only felt for one other person. Snow. Then my rampage begins._

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><p>I continue to tell Peeta of how I got taken by security and I made Plutarch promise. I guess I started to cry when I mentioned Prim. I hug his chest and soak it with my tears. He doesn't do anything. I pause and look up at the boy's face. It is as hard as stone.<p>

"Peeta, are you okay?" I ask him with a worried shake in my voice. Fearing that he is going to lash out and call me a mutt, I start to let go of his chest and back away. His strong hands grab mine, at the same time his eyes meet mine.

"He called, Katniss," he whispers. I look at him with confused eyes.

"Who? Who called you?"

"Gale."

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><p>Ohh, cliffy! Sorry about that. It was the best way to end it. I kind of feel like this chapter was short, even though it is 1,531 words. Again, I am sorry for the wait! ONLY 9 MORE DAYS UNTIL THE MOVIE! I am super hyped! Well, <strong>review<strong> and thanks for reading!


	8. Normal

Bonus Chapter! Here is Chapter 8! (Review honoring will be in next chapter, so review now!)

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><p>"Gale? Why…?" I ask. He shrugs, but doesn't look at my face. I lift his chin so he is looking at me. My gray eyes bore into his, asking him what he won't tell me. "Peeta…we lied to others. But we <em>never <em>lie to each other. I promise, that I will answer all of your questions truthfully," I swear, "What aren't you telling me?" He takes a deep breath.

"He saw us coming off the train…on TV…and he…he thinks that…" He hesitates before continuing, "That I have been…hurting you. And, he doesn't want me around you." Peeta stops, and takes a deep breath. He looks so small and defeated. "And I agree with him." My body reacts before my mind can even start to comprehend what he just said. My hand grabs his, and I yank him out of the bed.

"Come," I demand. I lead him out the door, and find that no one is in the hallway. _Of course not, Katniss. It's probably 12:30 in the morning. Now, where to? _I search my mind and think of the perfect place. I pull Peeta into the elevator and quickly press the button for the lobby. I notice Peeta opening his mouth to speak, but I put a finger over his mouth. He looks at my finger, then at me. His mouth closes immediately and we are left in the elevator to stand in silence.

The shiny doors slide open and once again I find my hand in Peeta's. Tugging on his arm, I pull him out of the hotel and into the cool air. Leaves blow on the street and I search. After about three minutes of looking back and forth, I see my destination. I turn to grin at Peeta, and tug on his arm again. I sprint toward the building, with Peeta dragging behind me.

When we get there, both of us are breathing hard. I cautiously look around me and take a few steps.

"Hello?" I say. It echoes all around us, like all of the Gamemakers were still here. Or maybe it's the souls of all the dead tributes. To my left, Peeta's crystal blue eyes go wide.

"Is this…?" he whispers. I grin.

"Yep. Welcome to the Training Center. But here's the thing. This isn't where we are going." He looks confused for a second, before it hits him. His face breaks out into a huge smile, and he spins me in his arms. I laugh and race him to our place. The roof-top garden.

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><p>My mouth falls to the floor. Everything is preserved. Not a single flower is touched. He immediately runs and picks up a primrose. His eyes close as he smells it.<p>

"Thank you, Prim. You will never be forgotten," Peeta whispers to the plant, "You were the flower in the thorns. The sun in the clouds. The pearl in the coal. Thank you." I see him reverently place the flower in the middle of the bush. I take five silent steps toward the man that just honored my sister in a way that I never could. I hug him from behind and whisper, "Thank you." He nods and wipes away the tears off of his handsome face.

I crouch and sit down onto the cool floor. Peeta plops down next to me, and he grabs my hand. My head leans against his shoulder. We talk about everything. What we miss, who we miss, and why we miss them. We talk of war, and of our lives. We wonder what we are going to do when we get back. We remember those moments that have made us smile. That's when Peeta catches me.

"I remember the first time I actually talked to you. It was on a Friday, during gym. I tripped and fell flat on my face. When I got up, my nose was bleeding so badly. It was all over the floor and my face. Coach told you to take me to the nurse. The walk there was pretty awkward, but when we got there I had built up the nerves to talk to you. I introduced myself and you just said that you knew who I was, only because we went to school together. I asked you about Prim and it looked like you were going to answer, but the nurse walked in and excused you. I smiled for the rest of the day." I stare at him and he just laughs.

"You remember that?" I ask, stunned. Peeta just nods and smiles.

"How could I not? You looked especially beautiful that day, wearing a light blue t-shirt and some black pants. I tripped because I was staring at you." He grins at the last part and I can't help but blush.

"I remember the time that you ran into a wall and the teacher talked to us about manners. He said, and I quote, 'Staring and pointing is not polite.' You were beet red," I reply, smiling at the memory. Peeta's face currently resembles what it had looked like so long ago.

"Oh…yeah, I remember that, too." He scratches the back of his neck, looking extremely embarrassed.

"Well, hey, we both had a thing for each other, I guess. I mean, neither of us really forgot about each other, right?"

"Yeah. I guess you really couldn't forget about this handsome thing right here, now could you?" He winks and gestures to himself, laughing. He and I sit there, laughing on the roof like he was never hijacked, and I was never scarred. And for once in our lives, we almost felt normal.

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><p>Sorry for the shortness! I wanted to post this before spring break, so I had to finish it now.<p>

I saw the movie! TWICE! I thought it was really good. What did you think? REVIEW! BY the way, Prim and Gale will be in next chapter! :)

Ideas/suggestions for the story? Send me a PM or Review!


	9. La Fleur Est Morte

Hey everybody! How was break? Well, sorry for not updating, I just had spring break and was in DC so….yeah. Thank you for everyone who reviewed!

**.** (Thanks! Hope you like this chapter as well.)

**Christina **(really? Oh. Well, hope you enjoy this chapter!),

**Maryclumsy **(Yeah, I wanted a fluff chapter. Well, here's the next one!),

**AprilPotter98 **(Yes, yes, I am evil. Thanks. I try to do my best on all chapters, so I'm glad you like it! Yeah, I really liked the movie, too.),

**Chalora **(No problem, we all are busy at times. Thank you! Prim does come in at this chapter, along with Gale. I will try not to make him 'evil' as I have seen many authors on FF do. I always thought that Peeta and Prim would get along well, so I decided to have Peeta honor her. Also, great minds think alike! Haha, enjoy!),

**ObsessedWithPeeta **(I'm glad you like!),

**sunshinemeg82 **(Yeah, I liked the movie a lot. I'm glad you love it!),

**hotpielookedlikehotpie **(Yeah, I loved the movie. It was very good!),

**Audrey **(You do know that I love to hear from you, right? Anyway, yes, I do have trouble with tenses, so I think after I post this I will revise them all. Thanks, and enjoy this one!),

**Diwoqd **(I'm glad you like it!),

**Yuumii **(Yeah, that is what I wanted her to do, so I'm glad that you like it.)

I hope everyone likes this chapter! Enjoy! PS: there is some...intense content in this one, so be aware.

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><p>This corner is darker than the others. It's closer to the tables, closer than the others. But the others had light, as this one did not. It's as if I am hiding from the tables, as if they hold something terrible. I sit there for a few more moments, waiting for something to happen, when a spotlight shines onto the first table.<p>

My shaky legs lift me up, and my feet carry me to the mahogany table. I gasp when I get close enough to see that this table is filled with pictures. Pictures of Prim. There she was, laughing, crying, smiling, singing, screaming, dancing, eating, feeding Lady, playing with Buttercup, looking at Peeta's cakes, learning…everything. There were hundreds of pictures of her, laid neatly and organized on the wooden table. I smiled looking at a particularly funny one, where she is walking around, acting like a duck.

The spotlight above suddenly shuts off, and I am stuck in a room of darkness. I stand there, waiting for the lights to turn back on. _If the lights turned off, then there must be someone_ _here,_ I think, while feeling my way around, using the table I was just looking at as a guide.

Right as I step in front of the other table, the spotlight comes back on and this time is focusing on the table in front of me. This table is made of the same wood as the other, only it is covered in a cloth. A cloth the color of blood. Above the table, on the wall, is a wooden board. On it, carved in golden writing, are the words, _'La fleur est morte'_. Curious, I stretch my arm out to touch the letters, and the cloth falls from the table.

Words cannot form when my eyes meet the contents of the table. My brain, my heart, and my body scream at me to run, to hide, to escape this wretched room, but I can't. My body is rigid with horror. I see Prim, once again, but this is not joyful, or happy. This, this is hell.

Thousands of photos of prim being tortured. There is her on fire, her flesh burning, her wearing a necklace of rope, her getting electrified, as Johanna did. There are pictures of her pleading for mercy as someone but a bullet through her head. I scream for my little sister as I see a photo of her getting torn apart from the mutts.

"You never escaped me, Miss Everdeen." I whip around, the pictures still burning in my eyes, to meet the snake-like eyes that I never wanted to see again. I let out a scream when Snow's hands reach out to squeeze my neck. I am pushed up against the torture table, with Snow's hands still grasping my neck. "_La fleur est morte_, Miss Everdeen,_ la fleur est morte_."

I start to loose consciousness when those four foreign words translate. Then I blackout with the words bouncing in my head: The flower is dead.

* * *

><p>Today I am alone. After my horrible nightmare, Peeta had a hijacking episode. Plutarch forced me out of the hotel, using Peeta's safety against me.<p>

"If you don't go, we will lock him up…" I agreed to leave, only because he had several bodyguards with him. I gave him a quick growl and left the building.

Now I walk alone, roaming the streets. I turn a corner and see a building that saved my life. Tigris's shop. I push the door open and see the many furs that were there. Tigris is sitting at the counter, eating some soup. By the looks of the place, she is doing fairly well. I guess the Rebellion benefited her.

"Tigris?" I ask. Her head jerks up and I see that familiar cat face again. "Hey. How's it going?" She gets up from behind the counter and gives me a hug.

"Good," she replies. Still not much of a talker, I guess. I shrug when her eyes ask me, _"Why are you here?"_

"Oh. Peeta. He's in the hospital. Hijacking." She nods, understanding that I don't want to talk about it. I look at some furs, feeling guilty that I am just walking in here with no purpose. I select a jacket, perfect for hunting, and bring it up to the counter. I pull out some money that Plutarch had stuffed in my hand before I left, but Tigris doesn't accept it. She simply says, "Free."

I give her a thankful nod and leave her store. I walk a little further, and come to the spot where I watched the raincoat girl get shot. I pause, staring at the spot, and briskly move on, not wanting to remember anymore.

I pass the bakery, and am reminded of Peeta. I decide to stop on my way to nowhere to get him some flowers. I pick a mix of dandelions, primroses, and lilies. Almost at once I am reminded of my nightmare. _La fleur est morte. _I thank the florist quickly and hurry out the door, trying not to loose it.

I take quick, light steps outside and try to gain my breath back. _Breathe, Katniss, breathe. _I almost laugh at myself when I say that in Peeta's voice. I gain a steady breathing pattern and walk a little further, buying some chocolates for Peeta and I. I end up seeing Cecilia, someone who I went to school with. She and I talk, but she tells me that she has to pick up her children. We say good-bye and go our own ways. I'm starting to think that, maybe Plutarch was right, I do need to get out more. But then, I reach the place that nearly took my life, and the place where I lost my sister.

I freeze, in the middle of the square. People are walking around me, but I don't see them. I don't see anyone. I just see my sister, going up in flames. I hear the screams, the terrible, terrible screams, over and over again. I push my hands on the sides of my head, and yell for it to stop. I call for Prim, but all I hear is her screaming, this time joined with mine. My eyes are consumed with flames, and I see Snow, flashing that horrible grin and saying, "_La fleur est morte. La fleur est morte." _

I can't tell what is happening anymore, only that my sister is gone, the flower is dead.

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><p>Okay! Sorry for the wait and the shortness of this chapter. <strong>Review!<strong>


	10. Hope

Yello! Sorry for the delay, family trouble and whatnot. So! This chapter kind of lacked reviews, but I'm okay with it. That's not the reason I'm writing, anyways. Before I start to ramble, I'm just going to do the Review thanks:

**Maryclumsy: **(Thank you! Just to let you know, I'm extremely grateful for all of your reviews.)

**Hagios: **(You have been extremely helpful. I will look the last chapter over, and make some revisions. I hope to see you in my inbox soon!)

**Team Tina: **(…You are annoying. Haha, just kidding. But seriously. See you at school! :p)

And to Jill, who I know has been reading this.

This is the big one-oh, guys. LET IT BLOW YOU AWAY.

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People say that everything heals over time. They say to forget about it, and live your life normally. They say it'll go away. They say that everything will be alright, and you will be happy again. But that's the thing. You can't. The grief and devastation runs through you every moment of every day. Just one word or object will set you off, and the images will come rushing in like a wave. You just can't get away. You'll be suffocated, drowning in the horrors. And even after weeks, or months, you still can't escape. Not fully. There will always be that dull stinging in your chest when you remember them.

I know I felt that same hurt the day I collapsed in the square, only a thousand times stronger. I was taken to the hospital and they sedated me, since I was thrashing around, trying to get to my little sister. I woke up to no one in the room, but the second I stood up, Haymitch flew in. He gave me a hug, and took care of me. I have now a greater appreciation for the old man than I ever could have before. He filled me in about what happened the two days I was out. And now, I know that when I ever have something going on, I have more than one person to go to.

I figured that even if I seem alone or feel alone, I will always have someone there to comfort me. As long as I do the same.

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I blink out of my daydream and try to pay attention to Paylor. She is going on and on about the hospital and how I scared some of the citizens. I yawn, and she narrows her eyes at me, giving me a look that says, _you weren't even listening, were you?_ I shrug my shoulders, confirming that she is right. I look behind Paylor to see Haymitch coming in. He looks around and snorts.

"This place needs a makeover." I look around and immediately agree with him. The room is cream colored, with gray chairs, a gray stage, and a gray podium. I turn back to Paylor, questioning the appearance of the room. Everything in the Capitol is bright, colorful, and creative. This dull room must have been made after the Rebellion.

"Yes, this room is rather boring. But we all agreed that we should have one room in the main building that isn't…distracting to anyone trying to listen to a speaker." When Paylor says the last few words she looks directly at me, and I can see some amusement in her eyes. I stand there, not exactly knowing what to say.

"Uh…" I mutter. Paylor smiles, and starts from the beginning.

"As I was first saying, after you…collapsed, you were taken to the hospital, correct?"

"Yes," I reply, not exactly understanding why she's asking me this.

"Did Haymitch explain everything to you?"

"What do you mean? Of course he did."

"Did he tell you about Peeta?" I immediately side-step so I can see the man eye to eye. He looks down sheepishly, as if he knew this was going to be asked.

"What happened to Peeta, Haymitch?" I ask harshly, waiting for an answer. Out of the corner of my tired eyes, I see Paylor looking between us quickly, nervous. Haymitch mumbles something unintelligible, and I ask him again, "Haymitch. What happened to Peeta?"

"He…He came to see you while you were in the hospital. I was there. He touched your face, and saw all the wires. He went nuts, screaming that they had killed you, and that we were gonna kill him, too," Haymitch says, with sadness in his eyes, "He has to be put in a room, just like when we were in 13. All locked up." I stand there, stunned. Suddenly, anger flies throughout my body. I am mad at Haymitch, for not stopping him. I am furious at Snow, for doing this. I am angry at Paylor, for keeping him locked up. But my feelings toward them are nothing compared to the ones I felt towards myself.

I'm always the reason Peeta is hurt. He is always there to save me, to take me from the nightmares, to protect me from the arena, to guard me from the world. And all I do is make it worse for him. I go off and continue my selfish ways, even when he needs me most. What happened to my promise? What happened to being strong?

I look at Paylor and Haymitch, both of them looking worried about what my next move is. _Instead of running of and being a baby_, I decide, _I am going to stand here and do everything I can for Peeta and Peeta only. _

"What now?" I ask, sitting down on one of the gray chairs. Paylor, stunned at my reaction, is silent. I shift my gaze to Haymitch, who seems just as stunned, only he wears a slight smile on his face. A smile of pride.

"Uh…well, if you are talking about Peeta, there's not much we can do. Having several mental relapses in the past week, the most we can do is let him be," Paylor explains slowly. I stay silent, thinking of ways we could communicate with him locked up and myself not allowed in the room. I reach for my neat braid, which a girl, Thalia Hayes, did for me while I was eating, and still very drowsy. I fiddled with the end, thinking of Beetee. He would know exactly what to do.

"President, where's Beetee?" I wonder, also remembering how none of us keep in touch anymore.

"Beetee is home, back in District 3. I'll get the phone, Ms. Everdeen," Paylor says, understanding my question. She walks away, only to return seconds later. The president hands me the silver device and a slip of paper. "He tends to ignore his calls. When you call, tell him it's from me, too." I laugh and punch in the numbers on the paper. Of course Beetee would have a habit of ignoring the calls. He has a tendency to be anti-social. I'm not much different either, though.

"Hello. This is the phone of Beetee Vails, I am busy. Leave a message." The beep goes off and I yell into the receiver, "Hi, Beetee! This is a message from Katniss and the President! Pick up or we are coming to bring you back here to the Capitol! Pick up now or…" I don't have to finish, for the inventor quickly answers the phone.

"Gosh, Katniss. What does the Capitol want now?" He asks harshly.

"Well, actually it's something for me, and…"

"Ugh, really? Then why'd you say Paylor wanted me, too? I am very busy!"

"Because she told me to, and you have to obey orders!"

"Continue with your proposal then," he sighs.

"Peeta is locked up again, and I'm not allowed to see him."

"Wait, you want me to help you break into his cell? And get in trouble? Why do you need me? You have a knack for breaking the rules…"

"Gah! That's not what I was gonna ask!"

"Going to."

"What?"

"Gonna is slang. The correct term is going to, not gonna," He corrects. I am silent as I do a face palm. _Always the teacher._

"Anyway, I need you to think of a system that Peeta and I can speak to each other without having to be in the same room." I wait for a few seconds, until I hear a large sigh on the other end. "What?"

"What are we doing, Katniss?"

"Talking on the phone."

"And where are you?"

"In the Capitol."

"Where am I?"

"At your house."

"Are we face to face?"

"No…"

"Are we in the same room?"

"No…" He doesn't say anything as the light bulb goes off in my mind. "Ohhhhh…" I say, feeling dumb.

"Yeah. Now go away so I can finish my plans."

"Okay…what are you building anyway?"

"A teleport."

"Oh. Okay. Bye then, Beetee."

"Bye, Katniss. Tell Peeta I said hi."

"Will do." I hang up the silver phone and run to Paylor. I tell her about what Beetee said, and how we need to bring a phone to Peeta's room. She agrees and calls the handy-man. Only half an hour later, the phone is in. I dial the numbers as fast as possible, excited to speak to Peeta. _What if he doesn't want to talk to me? _My worried brain thinks, and I hesitate on the call button. What if he really doesn't? He may hate me now, realizing that I'm always the reason he is hurting. I remember how many times I have hurt him, and I almost believe that he won't want to talk to me. Almost.

"Hello?" I hear through the machine, and I almost cry out in happiness.

"Peeta? It's Katniss," I say slowly, letting him to take it in.

"Katniss? I-I thought you were…gone. I thought you left me." His voice trembles when he says those words.

"No. I would never leave you. Never." He and I stay up all night, talking of life and talking of our old friends. And in a day of worry, doubt, and fear, we found a spark of hope. Hope that things will get better.

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TA-DA! How'd you like? Please review, and give me your thoughts.

Also-do you guys mind praying for my friend, Sam? She is in the hospital with a virus that attacked her brain. She is currently on life-support and she has a slim chance of survival.

And if there is anything you want to see me write, tell me, whether it is a new story or part of this one. Thank you to all who read this!


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